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Friday, October 12, 2012

The three little piggies

A CCA bedtime story

By Linda Felaco

Once upon a time, there were three little piggies. One piggy built a house North of One, the second piggy built a house on Watchaug Pond, and the third piggy built a house South of One. 

The North of One piggy didn’t build a very fancy house. Instead, he and his wife had a couple of little parasite piggies that they sent to the Chariho schools, which cost the other two piggies a lot of bacon.

This made the other two piggies really mad. One of them even went to the superintendent of schools and told him the school budget was too high. But the superintendent said, “No, the budget is just right.”

Now, the Watchaug Pond piggy had built his house right on the pond where his septic system drained straight into the water. And the South of One piggy had built a very fancy house right on the ocean in a flood zone that was always in danger from hurricanes.

But the Watchaug Pond piggy and the South of One piggy didn’t have any little parasite piggies and wrote lots of checks to the nice Charlestown Citizens Alliance people anytime the CCA was having trouble with the Narragansett Indians wanting to build senior-citizen housing or do anything that didn’t benefit the CCA.

One day, toward the end of summer, a big hurricane came along, and what do you think happened? The nice Charlestown Citizens Alliance people worked very hard to save the South of One piggy’s house and clean up all the sand and debris off the roads and make sure he and the Watchaug Pond piggy had electricity.

Meanwhile, the North of One piggy had to schlep to Town Hall for buckets of water because he had no electricity to power his well.

Then, when it was time for school to start, the nice Charlestown Citizens Alliance people said to the children of the North of One piggy, “We’re sorry, we have no more money for the Chariho schools. We used it all to buy more land on Watchaug Pond. The chair of the Planning Commission proved it mathematically that we could keep our taxes lower this way.”

“But don’t worry, little parasite children,” the nice Charlestown Citizens Alliance people said. “We’re going to give your parents vouchers to move to Westerly!”


Read the previous CCA bedtime story: