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Monday, March 9, 2026

What do you give a malignant narcissist who has more than enough of everything?

A New Raft of Trump Awards™, Buildings, and Lifetime Achievements

Paul Josephson for Common Dreams

   

At his February 2026 State of the Union address, Great Leader Donald Trump was atypically modest about his achievements as president in his second term. He has conquered inflation; ended eight wars; taken $1 off the price of gas; created jobs as never before; conquered unemployment; ridded the cities of criminals and immigrants; secured $18 trillion in investments with highly effective tariff wars; and created a peace board with a modest $1 billion entry fee.

Of course, none of these claims is true. But the president should be honored for his hard work and delusionary beliefs. President Trump loves nothing more than hearing his name and seeing it affixed, preferably in gold color, to apartment and office buildings, casinos, and consumer products. 

The board of trustees of John F. Kennedy Center for the Performing Arts, most of whom Trump appointed and whose chairman is Donald, voted to rename it the Trump-Kennedy Center. But more work is to be done. The following buildings, objects, and programs are just a first cut of the most important honors.

  • The Trump Constitution. Russian President Vladimir Putin promulgated one to make him president for life…
  • The Trump and Genesis “I Can’t Dance” Ball Room. For $1 million, you can have a lifetime “I Can’t Dance” membership.
  • Trump Archive and Bathroom. At Mar-a-Lago. Where he read classified documents, refused to return them, and washed his hands. Apparently.
  • Donald Trump Prisons. Geo Group, with 100 facilities and a total of 80,000 “beds” (or, as they are usually called “cells”), has become the second-largest contractor for Trump’s mass incarceration campaign, with a 700% increase in profits since 2024. Private prisons gave Trump over $1 million toward his reelection. And Trump is a felon. Trump deserves a prison or two.
  • The Trump Penn Station, Washington International Airport, and Gateway Tunnel. Trump said he would unfreeze roughly $16 billion in federal funding if Democrats support the name changes.
  • Trump Toll Booths. Fifty percent of tunnel tolls go to the Trump Organization through booths emblazoned in gold paint as “Trump Little Towers.”
  • The Trump Kennedy-Trump Center Drag Gala. To headline the opening of the 2026-27 season. It will include a reprise of the year 2000 drag performance of Trump with Rudy Guiliani. Special guest JD Vance dressed in drag as he was at Yale Law School. The Gala will be held monthly since schedule permits: Dozens of artists cancelled their performances.
  • Trump and Sons Gaza Resort. For $2 million you can name a Gaza skyscraper after yourself.
  • The Trump, Kennedy, Oz, and Heath Pharmacy. Medicaire has put a pause on funding medical equipment, orthotics, and prosthetics. For $1 million you can buy a pair of Trump Crutches™ for the needy.
  • Qatar Trump Airlines: What to do with a gifted 747? Daily flights between any golf course and Mar-a-Lago.
  • Trump Hospitals and Research Centers. No vaccinated or masked patients permitted. No cutting edge research allowed.
  • The Trump Center for Human Resources (Trump HR™). His university went bankrupt, and he paid a $25 million fine for it. But Trump is a wonderful judge of quality employees whose main virtue is making their boss look good. A half dozen top administration officials are in the Epstein files.
  • Trump Triumphal Arc. Bigger than the Arc de Triomphe in Paris, but dedicated to heroes with bone spurs who salute North Korean generals. The Arc would resemble the meaning of Albert Speer’s “Cathedral of Light” to commemorate the thousand-year Reich in Nuremburg.
  • The Jeff Epstein Beauty Pageant. Donald Trump co-owned and operated the Miss Universe Organization from 1996 to 2015. He bragged about going into dressing rooms. He may wish to re-acquire the business for his former friend (we have photos and emails).
  • Trump Veterinary Center and Restaurant. Menu includes Cats and Dogs.
  • Trump Amusement Park and Tariff Research Center. Highlight is the “TACO” Roller Coaster.
  • Trump Rushmore National Monument. Granted, it must overcome significant geological and structural issues, and significant political opposition. But entry valid with “Trump the Beautiful” Park pass. If you deface the pass which has his orange likeness, you are deported.
  • Trump Orange Cosmetics. Trump sells a tawdry fragrance whose slogan might be “Because real women love the kind of real man who smells of spray tan.” Also gaudy gold sneakers at only $800.
  • Trump Condoms. In gold wrapper with label “Tiny Hands, Big Ego.” (Men whose ring finger is longer than middle finger have slightly bigger penises than average. This apparently explains why Trump flipped off an autoworker on a visit to a Michigan Ford plant. The Trump Footlong wiener, sold in Chicago, is 3“ long.
  • Trump Cell Phones. Already in the works. None have been delivered as promised six months ago. Phone comes loaded—with one app, “Truth Social,” discounted to annual fee of $100 per year.
  • The Trump “Dzhugashvili” Prize. Joe Stalin awarded himself 11 major medals, including three Lenin prizes, but never the Stalin prize.
  • The Trump Legislative Award. To be given annually to Trump himself for the One Big Beautiful Bill Act signed into law in July 2025 that will impoverish Americans, lead to hunger crises, cut medical care, successfully enrich billionaires, enable Immigration and Customs Enforcement to detain residents without due process, and increase the deficit by $3 trillion in one decade.
  • Trump Currency. Name and stunning physiognomy on legal tender. Representative Joe Wilson (R-SC) introduced the “Donald J. Trump $250 Bill Act.” In addition to the slang for the $100 bill as the “C-note” and “Benjamin” (Franklin), there will be the “Cheeto” or “Taco” for the $250 bill.
  • Trump Collectible Cards. What could be more presidential? Already available including images of the four-time draft dodger wearing American flag boxing gloves that run counter to his own presidential order of August 2025 making it a crime to desecrate the flag.

To ensure these and other possibilities, in February 2026 Trump’s representatives filed three applications with the United States Patent and Trademark Office to trademark his name for future use on an airport in a variety of possible names, along “clothing, handbags, luggage, jewelry, watches, and tie clips.“ This would enable US citizens to continue to pay Trump through licensing fees. A reasonable patent lawyer might trademark ”Grifting President™“.

Trump has already immortalized his legacy in: at least eight Trump towers, and at least 13 others never completed; 10 other Trump buildings, and a dozen more never completed; a handful of Trump hotels, but at least 18 never completed or renamed;15 golf courses, and five abroad, and several under discussion abroad funded by Qataris and Saudis; seven former casinos and four never completed that led to six bankruptcies; and 94 felonies and one case of sexual abuse.

Trump can already be satisfied to learn that scientists have named several creatures after him: a fragile yellow-white moth (Neopalpa donaldtrumpi), a fossil sea urchin (Tetragramma donaldtrumpi), and Dermophis donaldtrumpi, the proposed name for a new species of blind amphibious 10 centimeter-long worm.

Paul Josephson is professor emeritus of history at Colby College and the author of 15 books, with 40 years of experience working in archives in Russia, Europe, and the U.S. on the political history of modern science.

Barron - time to enlist

Love the hat

Vital addition to your wardrobe, thanks to science. This is a real story, not a spoof.

Scientists Create “Smart Underwear” To Measure How Often We Really Fart

But would you really call it "smart?"

By Georgia Jiang, University of Maryland

Smart Underwear Prototype
Smart Underwear model. Credit: Brantley Hall,
University of Maryland.

Researchers at the University of Maryland have unveiled what they describe as the first wearable device built specifically to measure human flatulence.

Known as Smart Underwear, the discreet sensor system tracks hydrogen gas released during flatus, giving scientists an objective way to study a bodily function that has long relied on guesswork and self-reporting.

 Beyond counting how often people pass gas, the technology offers a new tool for observing gut microbial activity in daily life.

Scientists Prove Shellfish Can Be Farmed Far From Shore

Could offshore clamming become a thing?

By Kitta MacPherson

Laura Steeves (far right), a former postdoctoral student, collaborates
with a fishing partner to prepare a surfclam cage for deployment,
while Ailey Sheehan, a lab manager, activates sensors to facilitate
the launch. 
Sarah Borsetti/Haskin Shellfish Research Laboratory
Rutgers researchers have made a discovery that could change the future of seafood farming in New Jersey.

A study led by marine scientist Daphne Munroe has shown that Atlantic surfclams can be successfully farmed in the open ocean.

Her research, published in the North American Journal of Aquaculture, proves that offshore aquaculture is not only possible but promising. This method could help meet the increasing demand for seafood while protecting wild clam populations.

“We’re among the first to show that offshore clam farming can really work,” said Munroe, an associate professor in the Department of Marine and Coastal Sciences in the Rutgers School of Environmental and Biological Sciences. “It’s exciting because it opens the door to a new kind of business for New Jersey’s farming and fishing industries.”

The study was funded by a grant from the National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration and was done in partnership with commercial fishing companies. 

“We didn’t do this in a lab,” Munroe said, emphasizing the importance of working with industry partners. “We did it in the real world, with real fishermen. That’s what makes the results so meaningful.”

Aquaculture is the practice of farming fish, shellfish and other aquatic organisms. It’s similar to agriculture, but instead of growing crops on land, farmers raise seafood in water. Most aquaculture takes place near the shore in protected bays or in artificial ponds and lakes.

These areas are easier to manage and safer from storms, but they are crowded with other user groups like homeowners and boaters and can be subject to poor water quality which can hinder farm operations. Offshore aquaculture avoids these challenges, Munroe said, by using the vast, cleaner waters of the open ocean, where there is more room and less potential for pollution.

Members of Munroe’s team wanted to test whether surfclams, which are large, hard-shelled shellfish that live buried in sandy ocean bottoms, could be raised offshore, where space is more available. The clams, commonly used in chowders and fried clam strips, are an important part of New Jersey’s commercial fishing industry.

Video: Deploying the clams

Jailed immigrant children punished by Trump regime for telling their stories

Seized Art, Eavesdropping Guards: How do you spell crimes against humanity?

When guards appeared earlier this month outside the room Christian Hinojosa shared with her son and other women and children at the immigrant detention center in Dilley, Texas, she guessed what they might be after. She quickly donned her puffy winter jacket, then slipped a manila envelope inside it. “Thank God the weather was cool,” she said — the jacket didn’t raise suspicions.

Then, she said, she was instructed to leave the room while eight to 10 guards lifted up mattresses, opened drawers and rifled through papers. In the envelope were kids’ writings and artwork about life in America’s only detention facility for immigrant families, a collection of trailers and dormitories in the brush country south of San Antonio. She planned to share their letters with the outside world.

Guards have taken away crayons, colored pencils and drawing paper during recent room searches at Dilley, according to Hinojosa and three other former detainees, along with lawyers and advocates in contact with the families inside.

Guards have taken artwork, too, they said — even one child’s drawing of Bratz fashion dolls.

They said detainees have lost access to Gmail and other Google services in the Dilley library amid stepped up searches, seizures and restrictions on communications, making it more difficult for them to contact lawyers and advocates.

They and family members said guards sometimes hover within earshot during detainees’ video calls to relatives and reporters.

The detainees and others interviewed for this story said these measures increased after the Jan. 22 arrival of Liam Conejo Ramos, a 5-year-old in a blue bunny hat, sparked protests and congressional visits. They said the clampdown intensified as children and parents at Dilley wrote letters to share with the public and reporters and relatives recorded video calls with the detainees, including those published by ProPublica this month. The children’s stories, many told in their own words, fueled an outcry over the scope of the Trump administration’s deportation campaign, which the president had promised would focus on criminals.

The detainees said the more they tried to make their voices heard, the more difficult it became.

Sunday, March 8, 2026

Rightwing Florida MAGAnut running against Rep. Seth Magaziner gets a warm Rhode Island welcome

Protesters gather outside Crowne Plaza in Warwick to protest candidate Vic Mellor and his right-wing 'Rhode Island First Rally'

Steve Ahlquist

©2026 Anthony Ricci

Florida businessman Vic Mellor has announced his intention to challenge Seth Magaziner for the 2nd Congressional District seat in Rhode Island. 

Mellor participated in the January 6, 2021, United States Capitol attack, which he described to Kathy Gregg at the Providence Journal: “January 6 was [in the] top five of the emotional feelings you have for being part of something." 

He and his son, said Mellor, made it inside the Capitol building that day. Mellor is a friend of retired Army General Michael Flynn and has been involved in Flynn’s Reawaken America tour. [See: Michael Flynn and the ‘Destiny of America’]

“I look forward to campaigning for another term next year,” said Representative Magaziner in a statement. “The stakes are high. No one who attacked the Capitol on January 6 should represent Rhode Island in Congress, and especially not someone who has lived outside our state for 30 years.”

As part of his campaign, Mellor held a Rhode Island First Rally1 on Saturday, March 7, at the Crowne Plaza Providence-Warwick Airport, which drew protesters and counter-protesters to the hotel entrance. Under the watchful eye of Warwick Police Officers, around 75 people gathered across the street from the hotel entrance, holding signs and chanting. Around a dozen counter-protesters stood at the entrance of the hotel, holding signs in support of President Trump and ICE.

Among the protesters were members of organizations opposed to extreme right-wing politics, including Li’l Rhode Visibility Brigade, The West Bay Blue Wave, South County Resistance, South County Rising, Stand Up Rhode Island, Indivisible East Bay RI, Cranston Forward, RI-WTF Resistance Coalition, Indivisible Metro RI, Jewish Voice for Peace - RI, and Indivisible South Coast New England.

Reporter Pat Ford has pictures on Facebook from inside Mellor’s Rhode Island First Rally.

©2026 Anthony Ricci

 SteveAhlquist.news is a reader-supported publication. To receive new posts and support my work, consider becoming a free or paid subscriber. 

Well, there's that

Great leadership, huh?

Kristi is gone...time for these fools to go

With federal award of up to $22 million, Brown researchers to study treatment to slow the human aging process

Brown recoups some of the research money Trump took away to study aging

Brown University

What if people could stay healthier, stronger and mentally sharper as they grow older — not by treating diseases one by one, but by slowing a biological process that drives aging itself? 

A study led by researchers at Brown University and the University of Rochester will test whether a drug developed to treat HIV can quiet a chronic immune response triggered by the body’s own DNA, to help preserve health and function later in life.

The project is supported by a contract up to $22 million from the federal Advanced Research Projects Agency for Health (ARPA-H). The agency’s highly competitive awards are designed to accelerate bold ideas that, if successful, could reshape how medical providers approach major health challenges. The team is one of several selected by the agency’s PROactive Solutions for Prolonging Resilience (PROSPR) program.

More than 70 million Boomers needing the right kind of medical care

There aren’t enough geriatricians (or home health workers or primary care doctors)

Jerry Gurwitz, UMass Chan Medical School

More than 70 million baby boomers – those born between 1946 and 1964 – are alive today. In 2026, the oldest of them are turning 80.

With longer lives often comes more complicated health needs: multiple chronic conditions, long lists of medications, balance problems that can increase the risk of falls, and changes in memory. Many older adults also begin relying more on spouses, children or other family members to help manage medical decisions.

Ideally, health care in later life should go beyond just treating individual diseases and medical conditions. It should aim to help older people maintain health, independence and optimal quality of life for as long as possible.

Doctors and nurse practitioners trained in geriatrics specialize in doing exactly that. As a geriatrician for nearly four decades, I’ve seen how the right care for older people can prevent falls, reduce risk of medication side effects and help patients make medical decisions that reflect their goals and wishes.

The problem? There just aren’t enough of us. Finding a health care provider with expertise in geriatrics can be extraordinarily difficult. But there’s good news: You can use a few simple strategies that geriatricians rely on to have more productive conversations with your or your family member’s doctor.

AG details scope of Catholic Church child sexual abuse and cover-ups in RI over decades

Providence Catholic bishop apologizes to victims of clergy sex abuse

By Christopher Shea, Rhode Island Current

For more than seven decades, the Roman Catholic Diocese of Providence concealed the sexual abuse of hundreds of children by over six dozen clergy members, according to a long-awaited report released Wednesday by Rhode Island Attorney General Peter Neronha. 

A total of 72 deacons and priests faced credible accusations of abuse dating as far back as 1950, the 282-page report states. Only 14 of the men listed are still alive. 

Systemic sexual abuse by New England Catholic clergy was exposed over two decades ago. But the AG’s report, which took nearly seven years to complete, pieces together as complete a picture as possible of what happened in Rhode Island, home to the largest per capita Catholic population in the nation. 

“The numbers are staggering, shocking, astounding,” Neronha told reporters during a more than two-hour press conference at his downtown Providence office. “And we know we didn’t get it all.”

State Police and the AG’s office found at least 315 victims of abuse, most of which occurred during the 1960s and 1970s. The most recent known incident of misconduct cited was in 2011, when the principal of St. Joseph School in West Warwick alleged a deacon who taught in the school “had pulled down the pants of several sixth-grade boys.”

Most accused priests avoided disciplinary action or criminal charges because the diocese would often transfer them to new parishes without warning those congregations — a practice the report called “priest shuffling.” Neronha said 31 Rhode Island priests were transferred at least five times during their careers, promoting a “culture of secrecy.”

“That went on for decades,” Neronha said.

Only 20, or about 26% of the clergy identified in the report, ever faced criminal charges. Just 14 clergy were convicted. 

Neronha’s office has charged four current and former priests with sexual abuse for allegations over the course of the investigation between 2020 and 2022. 

Three of them are still awaiting trial, while the fourth died after being deemed incompetent to stand trial in 2022.

Saturday, March 7, 2026

Trump killed The US lost $35B in clean energy projects last year

Lost jobs, lost opportunities

Naveena Sadasivam, Senior Staff Writer

"This story was originally published by Grist. Sign up for Grist's weekly newsletter here."

For more than a decade, the clean energy economy has been on a steep growth trajectory. Companies have poured billions of dollars into battery manufacturing, solar and wind generation, and electric vehicle plants in the U.S., as solar costs fell sharply and EV sales surged. That momentum is set to continue surging in much of the world — but in the United States, it’s starting to stall.

According to a new report from the clean energy think tank E2, new investment in clean energy projects last year was dwarfed by a cascade of cancellations for projects already in progress. For every dollar announced in new clean energy projects, companies canceled, closed, or downsized roughly three dollars’ worth. 

In total, at least roughly $35 billion in projects were abandoned last year, compared to just $3.4 billion in cancellations in 2023 and 2024 combined.

Hooray! Daylight savings time is back tonight

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